


it's cruel i gotta choose

by stray_dog_sick



Series: harmonious symp(hony/athy) [3]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol, Connor Needs A Hug, Drunk Texting, Established Relationship, M/M, Unhealthy Relationships, no understanding of how politics works, or calling, potentially
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-17
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:20:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22774030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stray_dog_sick/pseuds/stray_dog_sick
Summary: 7 March 2039"You're going to New York. For a week. Without me. What if something happens to you, and I'm not there?" He worried all the time, he just wanted to keep Markus safe. Hank said that was 'unhealthy' and 'obsessive', but he didn't care.
Relationships: Connor/Markus (Detroit: Become Human)
Series: harmonious symp(hony/athy) [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1606975
Kudos: 21





	it's cruel i gotta choose

**Author's Note:**

> The amount of fic I post is directly correlated to the number of breakdowns I have and the number of trains I take in a given month
> 
> Title from / inspired by 'Long Shot' by Transviolet

Connor had zoned out of the meeting half an hour ago, letting his memory bank record it but not putting any effort into processing the information at the time. There was no point taking in times and locations of meetings that he wasn't invited to, especially when thinking about them made the area around his thirium pump ache.

He didn't even notice the rest of the leaders leaving until Markus was sat on the table in front of him. He blinked, forcing his optical units to focus on Markus' face.

"What's wrong? You look upset," Markus asked, reaching out to cup Connor's cheek. Connor relaxed into it, letting the glide of Markus's thumb over his skin wipe away some of his worries.

"You're going to New York. For a week. Without me," he replied eventually, forcing himself to keep eye contact. It was hard for him sometimes, seeing people's eyes change as they judged his words, but he knew Markus liked it when he tried. The look Markus gave him felt like a punch in the gut, but he couldn't look down and make it even worse.

"I have to go, Connor," Markus said with a sigh. "It's an invitation to the UN. Our chance to make a difference for our kind globally. Not to mention all the interviews Chloe has already arranged."

Connor blinked again.  _ Keep looking, it's okay, he doesn't hate you. _ "What if something happens to you though, and I'm not there?" He worried about Markus all the time, and sometimes he felt as if he would be better suited to 'bodyguard' than 'businesses and services liaison'. Sure, this allowed him to still work at the police department with time off for important meetings, but all he wanted was to keep Markus safe. Hank said that was 'unhealthy' and 'obsessive', but he didn't care.

"Nothing's going to happen, I'll have Josh and Chloe with me the whole time, and we've been offered some security by the government too." Connor knew Markus was doing his best to be reassuring, and it was working a little, but they both knew Connor would never be completely happy with the idea.

They would have security, though. That was good. It meant Connor would have someone other than himself to blame if the worst did happen. 

"I'll miss you," he said finally, barely loud enough to be heard. He sighed in relief as Markus leant forward to kiss him - not just because it confirmed that Markus wasn't mad at him, but because he could finally close his eyes for a moment. 

He clung to Markus' shirt and pulled him in for another kiss after the first one ended far too quickly. Kissing, intimacy, was still new to Connor, but he was quickly becoming obsessed with it too. How could he go without this for a whole week? How could he lay in bed without Markus at his side, without somebody to hold in the early hours when bad memories came back to plague them both?

"I'll miss you too," Markus replied when Connor finally let him go. "Now, can we go home? I want to spend as much time with you as possible before I leave."

How could Connor say no to that?

\---

Markus had been in New York for four days and he hadn't called Connor since the plane had landed. Connor pulled his number up every few hours, but couldn't bring himself to hit 'call' in case he interrupted something in Markus' busy schedule. Instead he read every interview, watched every television appearance, and preconstructed scenarios where he was in New York too. 

It was late evening when he finally got the 'incoming call' notification, distracted him from the basketball game that Hank insisted on watching. He almost ran to the spare bedroom, ignoring his brothers' questions, and locked the door behind him. If this call lasted all night then they could go into stasis on the couch, he didn't care.

_ "Hey, Connor," _ Markus said as soon as the call connected. He was slurring his words a little, and Connor's heart dropped. Their first conversation in four days, and Markus was drunk. Connor hated drunk phone calls.

"Hi, Markus. How are you?" he replied, hoping none of his disappointment was audible. They could have a nice conversation, everything would be fine, and Markus would be home soon. Everything was fine.

" _ I'm so tired, Connor. So fucking tired."  _ That caught Connor by surprise. Markus rarely sweared, said that he didn't see the point of using foul language to get his point across. " _ All I do is talk all day, say the same things, and half the time they don't listen. I got asked five times this week about whether me and North are a couple! As if we haven't been saying no to that question since November!" _

Connor had to laugh at that. The public's refusal to believe that the two friends weren't dating was entertaining, even if it was starting to get tiring. "Well, maybe you should tell them that you have a boyfriend, that would shut them up."

Markus sighed on the other end of the line. " _ I don't wanna drag you into this, they'd never leave you alone. Wouldn't be fair." _

"I know what I signed up for, Markus," Connor replied, but didn't press any further. "Is that why you've been drinking?" he asked instead.

" _ No, no, we went out earlier because the UN members finally agreed to make androids not illegal, like, we can live or go anywhere in the world now. Probably wouldn't help us if we got hurt or in trouble but at least they can't kick us out of Canada anymore." _

"That's great news! We knew change was going to take time, one small step is better than none." Connor had never felt the urge to leave America, but he thought of the Chapman's over the border, how scared they were every time they checked in with Jericho that they'd be caught smuggling androids into the country. They didn't have to worry anymore. They could begin to live normal lives.

" _ Yeah, so we went out to celebrate, have you ever seen Josh drunk? It's great. He tells all these history stories but he gets all confused and does it like he was there, which is so funny because he was not alive in 1066, but he tells it like he was."  _ Connor let Markus ramble for as long as he wants, because it'd been four days and he missed the other's voice so much.  _ "But then I realised. I'm not even having fun, you know? Everyone is laughing and dancing and I want to do all that stuff too but I want to do it with you and you're not here, so I called you instead." _

"I wish I was there too," Connor said. "I miss you."

" _ Bet I miss you more," _ Markus replied, and Connor swallowed a comment about betting being illegal.  _ "I have so much to tell you. Like flying! That was so weird." _

"Well, we have all night." Connor smiled. He would listen to Markus recite every ingredient in whatever thirium cocktail he'd been drinking if that's what Markus wanted to talk about. He listened to stories about interviews he'd already seen five times, and in return told Markus about every dumb thing Hank or Gavin had done that week. If he closed his eyes he could almost pretend he wasn't in bed alone.

And if he went into stasis during a quiet moment at work the next day, that was no one's business but his.


End file.
